Columbia University Health Services

Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer people may be sexually assaulted by someone of the same or opposite sex, within a relationship or outside of it, by an acquaintance or a stranger in a bias attack. Experiencing a sexual assault in the context of coming out, without someone you trust, and in a society which is homophobic and heterosexist can be extremely difficult and confusing. Even having the words and language to explain the experience may be challenging.

"I do not know what to call it.”

Sometimes, people have experiences that are confusing and painful, but they may not recognize what happened as a sexual assault. In same-sex sexual assaults it can be especially confusing.

It might be confusing because:

• They knew the person who hurt them
• There wasn’t any physical violence involved
• There was no penetration involved
• The sexual assault was not physical painful
• They agreed and wanted some sexual activity, but not as far as it went
• It did not last for a long time and was over quickly
• Their body responded sexually to what happened
• They were forced to perform a “sexual” act on or touch the assailant

Even if you do not know what to call what happened, what matters is how you feel about it.

Here are some other things to consider:

Bias assaults

• Bias assaults target someone directly because of their sexual orientation in a punishing and humiliating manner. For a victim of a bias assault feeling secure in their sexual orientation, being 'out' for a longer period of time and comfortable with who they are, and/or having a solid base of community and other support to draw upon can help combat the extreme negative messages that the assailant may have directed towards them.
• Where someone is in their coming out process when an assault occurs can be important. Shame is often a major barrier to people feeling safe about coming out, and if an assault occurs before they have had the opportunity to develop a support system and to feel confident and secure with their sexual orientation, it may significantly add to the level of shame and confusion the survivor experiences. On the other hand, feeling a sense of stability in the area of life that the assailant aimed to weaken and destroy can provide a base with which to begin healing and be a source of strength during this difficult time.
• Transgendered people can be sexually assaulted because they are known to be transgender, or can be the victim of another crime and then be sexually assaulted when it is discovered that they are transgender.
  

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Sexual Violence Prevention and Response Program (SVPRP) provides comprehensive and integrated education, support and advocacy about sexual and relationship violence. The program supports survivors and fosters individual and collective action to end sexual and relationship violence. For more information go to the Sexual Violence Prevention and Response Program.

Homophobia:  What it’s all About

This is an introductory workshop that covers the basics of homophobia, starting with definitions and exploring misconceptions and stereotypes. Participants use personal experience to understand the effects of homophobia on the daily lives of LGBT people. For more information go to Workshops, Groups, and Training.

The Barnard Columbia Rape Crisis/Anti-Violence Support Center provides peer counseling and advocacy services for survivors and co-survivors of sexual and relationship violence. For more information go to the Barnard-Columbia Rape Crisis/Anti-Violence Support Center.

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