Columbia University Health Services


Stopping Rape: What Men Can Do

General Information

All men can play a vital role in rape prevention. Here are a few of the ways:

Be aware of language. Words are very powerful, especially when spoken by people with power over others. We live in a society in which words are often used to put women down, where calling a girl or woman a "bitch," "freak," "whore," "baby," or "dog" is common. Such language sends a message that females are less than fully human. When we see women as inferior, it becomes easier to treat them with less respect, disregard their rights, and ignore their well-being.

Communicate. Sexual violence often goes hand in hand with poor communication. Our discomfort with talking honestly and openly about sex dramatically raises the risk of rape. By learning effective sexual communication, stating your desires clearly, listening to your partner, and asking when the situation is unclear, men make sex safer for themselves and others.

Speak up. You will probably never see a rape in progress, but you will see and hear attitudes and behaviors that degrade women and promote rape. When your best friend tells a joke about rape, say you don't find it funny. When you read an article that blames a rape survivor for being assaulted, write a letter to the editor. When laws are proposed that limit women's rights, let politicians know that you won't support them. Do anything but remain silent.

Support survivors of rape. Rape will not be taken seriously until everyone knows how common it is. In the U.S. alone, more than one million women and girls are raped each year (Rape in America, 1992). By learning to sensitively support survivors in their lives, men can help both women and other men feel safer to speak out about being raped and let the world know how serious a problem rape is.

Contribute your time and money. Join or donate to an organization working to prevent violence against women. Rape crisis centers, domestic violence agencies, and men's anti-rape groups count on donations for their survival and always need volunteers to share the workload.

Talk with women about how the risk of being raped affects their daily lives; about how they want to be supported if it has happened to them; about what they think men can do to prevent sexual violence. If you are willing to listen, you can learn a lot from women about the impact of rape and how to stop it.

Talk with men about how it feels to be seen as a potential rapist; about the fact that 10-20% of all males will be sexually abused in their lifetimes; about whether they know someone who has been raped. Learn about how sexual violence touches the lives of men and what we can do to stop it.

Organize. Form your own organization of men focused on stopping sexual violence. Men's anti-rape groups are becoming more and more common around the country, especially on college campuses. If you have the time and the drive, it is a wonderful way to make a difference in your community.

Work to end other oppressions. Rape feeds off many other forms of prejudice including racism, homophobia, and religious discrimination. By speaking out against any beliefs and behaviors, including rape, that promote one group of people as superior to another and deny other groups their full humanity, you support everyone's equality.

Do not ever have sex with anyone against his/her will! No matter what. Although statistics show most men never rape, the overwhelming majority of rapists are male. Make a promise to yourself to be a different kind of man, one who values equality and whose strength is not used for hurting.

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On-Campus Resources

Sexual Violence Prevention and Response Program (SVPRP) provides comprehensive and integrated education, support and advocacy about sexual and relationship violence. The program supports survivors and fosters individual and collective action to end sexual and relationship violence. For more information go to the Sexual Violence Prevention and Response Program

Allies: Men’s Role and Responsibility in Preventing Violence against Women
This workshop explores how men can be allies with women in preventing violence against women. Participants explore what steps can be personally taken as men in order to become part of the solution in creating a safe and secure campus environment. For more information go to Workshops, Groups, and Training

Understanding Sexism 101
This workshop explores what women and men face under the system of sexism. Together we look at gender roles, current statistics, and our own life experiences to understand how sexism has affected us and our relationships with one another. At the end of this workshop participants learn how one can become an agent of positive change. For more information go to Workshops, Groups, and Training

The Barnard Columbia Rape Crisis/Anti-Violence Support Center provides peer counseling and advocacy services for survivors and co-survivors of sexual and relationship violence. For more information go to the Barnard-Columbia Rape Crisis/Anti-Violence Support Center

The Men’s Peer Education Program promotes personal and community accountability to challenge beliefs and behaviors that encourage sexual violence. For more information go to the Men’s Peer Education Program

Disciplinary Procedure for Sexual Misconduct 212 854 1717  

Barnard Health Services 212 854 2092 

Barnard clinician on-call 212 666 5838

Barnard Furman Counseling Services 212 854 2092 

Barnard Public Safety 212 854 3362 

Counseling & Psychological Services 212 854 2468 

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Columbia University clinician-on-call for after-hours health concerns 212 854 9797 

Columbia University Public Safety 212 854 2796  

Nightline (10pm-3am) 212 854 7777 

Morningside Campus University Ombuds Office 212 854 1234 

Columbia University Medical Center Campus 212 305 3400

Columbia University Medical Center for Student Wellness 212 304 5564

Columbia University Medical Center Mental Health Services 212 795 4181 

Columbia University Medical Center clinician-on-call 212 305 5549

Medical Center Campus Public Safety x99 or 305-8100 

Columbia University Medical Center Office of Equal Opportunity and Affirmative Action 212 854 5511

Off-Campus Resources

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Important Phone Numbers

General Information 212 854 2284
After-hours urgent health concerns 212 854 9797
CAVA (Ambulance) 212 854 5555
Rape Crisis/Anti-Violence Support Center 212 854 WALK
Uptown Campus Public Safety
 - On-Campus 7-7979
 - Off-Campus 212-305-8100